


How to Get a Dick Pic in Five Steps

by TheDarkNightsRun



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Bad Jokes, Choi Youngjae knows all, Dick Jokes, Dick Pics, Humor, Jackson's dick is the only part of Jackson we care about, Lists, M/M, Mark is needy, No Smut, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-30
Updated: 2016-03-30
Packaged: 2018-05-30 04:59:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6409801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDarkNightsRun/pseuds/TheDarkNightsRun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was three weeks since Mark hooked up with a guy he's been nonstop texting. With some pressuring from his asshole friends and a helpful five step list from Youngjae, Mark gets a dick pic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How to Get a Dick Pic in Five Steps

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: the steps taken in this story do not guarantee a dick pic, but for the purposes of Markson, they do result in a dick pic.
> 
> However, do not undergo these steps unless you absolutely want a dick pic and are willing to see a dick, I learned that the hard way.
> 
> Also, the texting format is like an iPhone, so right it Mark and left are the other people.
> 
> Shoutout to the men of Got7, this wouldn't have been possible without them.

“Wait wait wait, so you’re telling me you’ve been talking to a guy you met at a bar three weeks ago over text for three weeks and still haven’t met up yet?” Jaebum asked, a little flabbergasted by Mark’s declaration.

Mark rolled his eyes slightly at Jaebum while he nodded and flipped his phone in his hands, “Yeah, I mean, it’s not like we’re serious or anything. We fucked but that doesn’t entail a steady relationship.” 

Jinyoung looked up from where he was eating noodles. “But you haven’t seen each other since?”

Mark nodded, raising his eyebrows and looking at his friends as if they were idiots for not understanding what he just said. “Yeah, so?”

“And you haven’t sent each other any pictures?” Jaebum asked, leaning his elbows on the table and fixing Mark with an intrigued gaze.

“Nope,” Mark said. 

Jaebum sighed and looked down at his forgotten bowl of noodles, “Mark Tuan, I have never been more disappointed in you.”

Jinyoung slurped up a noodle as he nodded, agreeing with Jaebum. 

Mark sighed. Like he was ever really going to send that guy a dick pic. It’s not like he hadn’t already seen it once before. He looked at his phone and turned the screen on, seeing a text from the person of interest. He opened it, trying to keep his face as neutral as possible to keep his asshole friends out of his business.

 

Today 12:34 p.m.

_Hey :)_

_Hey_

_What’s up?_  

_Hanging with asshole friends. You?_

_Pretty much the same :P_

_Lol_

 

Their conversations never escalated much past that. It was a weird relationship, Mark had to admit, but he enjoyed the simplicity of it. Especially with university being so hectic these days since final exams were coming up before winter break.

“Earth to Mark,” Jaebum said, waving his hand in front of Mark’s face, “Jr. and I are heading back to the dorms to study, wanna come or naw?”

Mark scoffed and rolled his eyes, “Like you two are actually going to study.” He made a crude gesture with his hands.

Jaebum smirked and shrugged in agreement while Jinyoung gasped dramatically and put a hand over his heart, “Well I never.”

Mark chuckled and stood up, picking up his empty noodle bowl and stashing his phone in his pocket as it buzzed with an incoming text. “Nah, I have shit to do. You two have fun,” he said, starting to walk out of the food court.

Jaebum called his name and stopped Mark at the trash can, “At least ask that guy for a dick pic, Mark. Trust me.”

Mark puffed out his cheeks and made a face at his friend before turning to go back to his own dorm.

Would he actually receive a dick pic if he asked, though?

Admittedly, Mark had never gotten one and he was a little curious, but what was the point of it if he’d already seen the person’s dick?

Mark pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked at the text.

 

_Ugh could really use a bj rn :’((((_

 

It was an innocent enough text, but it got Mark thinking. It might be fun to get a picture from this guy, and he could always use it to help him through dry spells if he really needed.

That was when Mark decided he was going to ask Jackson Wang for a dick pic.

 

……………….

 

Step 1: Initiate Conversation with Mildly Sexual Undertones 

 

Mark sat down in his Econ class and looked over the list Youngjae had been so kind to supply him with on some steps that will guarantee a dick pic. It was relatively small with arrows pointing from some steps to possible outcomes or responses, but other than that it seemed do-able. 

Step one was rather easy, Mark and Jackson already flirted a little while they talked and it wouldn’t be too much if Mark upped his subtle sluttiness a few degrees.

“Alright, class, open your textbook to page 101 and get ready for the lecture,” the overly giddy professor said as she walked in and turned on the projector.

Mark inwardly groaned and put the list in his pocket, opening his book up and pushing Jackson Wang’s dick to the back of his mind.

An hour later, Mark looked at the list again as he sat in the grass of the courtyard.

Now that he thought about it, he wasn’t very sure how to talk with mildly sexual undertones. Usually he’d just add a winky face with a flirty text and that’ll be that, but to have a whole flirty conversation was a whole new area. He decided to give it a go.

 

Today 13:39 p.m. 

_Did you know duck penis’ are corkscrew shaped?_

 

Smooth Mark, real smooth.

 

_I did not_

_Very interesting_

_They are also twice as long as the duck's body_  

_So is mine_

_No one’s fascinated by that  tho:(_

 

Now they’re getting somewhere.

 

_Hmmm, I don’t know_

_Someone may have to do a measurement_

 

Mark laid back on the grass and put a hand behind his head, waiting with baited breath for Jackson to respond. He almost dropped his phone on his face when he saw an incoming text.

 

_Are you volunteering?_

 

_I never said I was, but if you asked kindly…._

 

“Yo, Mark Twain.”

Mark sighed in disappointment at his friends ever so creative nickname. He sat up and fixed Jaebum with a dead stare. 

Jaebum stopped a few feet away and jumped back a little when he saw the intensity of Mark’s glare. “The fuck?”

“What do you want?” Mark grunted, noting the silence of his phone and lack of an incoming text.

Jaebum recovered and stalked over to Mark, flumping down next to him, “Well, I was going to ask if you had the notes from North American Geography, but judging by Youngjae’s list there I change my mind. Have you gotten a dick pic yet?"

“No,” Mark grumbled, a little disgruntled by the fact that Jackson hadn’t responded yet. Mark needed to move onto step two, goddamnit.

Jaebum hummed and threw himself back, laying spread eagle on the grass and looking up at the sky. Mark joined him with a sigh. “Maybe he’s just playing hard to get?” Jaebum muttered, raising his hand towards the sky in an attempt to touch the fluffy white cloud floating by.

Mark shrugged even though he knew Jaebum wasn’t looking. He had tried to complete step one, but Jackson fucking Wang won’t respond. He mimicked Jaebum’s position on the grass.

Mark sniffled a little and put an arm behind his head. It was probably going to take a while, but he was going to complete Youngjae’s list and get that damn dick pic, no matter the cost.

 

…………………..

 

Step 2: Bring Up Sexual Topic 

 

Jackson motherfucking Wang didn’t text Mark back until fucking 8 a.m. the next morning. 

Mark was sleeping happily in his bed, not a care in the world, when suddenly a series of incoming texts shook him awake.

They weren’t even interesting texts.

 

Today 8:19 a.m.

_Morning ;)_

_Are you even awake yet?_

_If you’re not you should be_

_It’s a beautiful day today_

 

Mark groaned and turned onto his back, throwing an arm over his eyes. It seems Jackson wasn’t going to address yesterday's conversation. 

Whatever though, right? Mark was just going to move onto step two. He looked at his phone again, finally processing what time it was and realising he had a class in ten minutes. He was going to have to text Jackson back later and step two was going to have to wait.

Mark jumped out of bed, walking across the cold tile floor with bare feet to his roommate's bed, “Youngjae, wake up. We got class.”

Youngjae whined and buried deeper under his blanket, then he slowly turned his head up to Mark. “Did you get that dick pic?” he asked, his voice scratchy from sleep and his eyes still closed.

Mark shook his head because sadly no, he hadn’t. “No, but I will soon, now let’s go to class.”

Later, after class ended, Mark found himself sitting on the grass in the courtyard again, flipping his phone in his hands. He didn’t know exactly what sexual topic to bring up. Maybe something about bottoming? When they were together, it was Mark who bottomed, so maybe he could ask Jackson. Or something about a blowjob….

 

Today 10:35 a.m. 

_If someone was giving you a blojob,_

_would you make them swallow?_

 

It took a few minutes for Jackson to respond.

 

_Idk. If they wanted to_

_Would you force them to?_

_Naw man, that’s rude_

_Do you like it if they swallow tho?_

_Yeah, I find it kinda hot_

 

Mark didn’t know where to go from there. He had Anatomy next so he could always talk about the different types of peni. Or…..

 

_Have you ever bottomed before?_

 

It was a risky text, Mark knew. The rapid change in subject may put  Jackson off and Mark could have just majorly fucked up.

Fuck fuck fuck, he did just fuck up and now he was never going to-

Oh, wait.

 

_No, but I’ve been thinking about it_

 

Well that changes things.

Mark grinned like a cheshire cat as he responded instantly.

 

_Would you now?_

_With who?_

 

Jackson didn’t respond, and he didn’t have to. At least, not yet.

Which was why Mark was genuinely surprised by his phone buzzing with an incoming text from Jackson that night as he studied in the library.

 

Today 21:52 p.m. 

_Someone I know and trust, I guess_

 

Well… that certainly made things easier.

 

……………..

 

Step 3: Offer to complete said Sexual Topic 

 

Mark was… not sure how to complete step three. It didn’t look like it would be too hard to complete, but he knew himself well enough to know there was a very good chance he’d fuck this up. 

So as he sat in the campus library, surrounded by other quietly working students, Mark decided to attempt sexting.

 

_Do you trust me?_

 

Mark’s heart was beating out of his chest and he could feel himself start to shake. Why was he even shaking? He has had many a sex, so how could doing it over the phone be any different?

 

_Mark Tuan, I’ve met you irl once_

_And? I let you put your dick in me_

_You got me there_

 

Mark smirked, but didn’t know how to continue the conversation from there. Then an idea hit him in the form of a skinny freshman from Thailand who went by the name of BamBam.

 

**Guns Go Bam**

Today 22:10 p.m.

 

_I have a question_  

_And I have an answer_

_Long time no talk btw :D_

 

It had been a long time, Mark had to agree. But university was hard and BamBam lived on the other side of campus

 

_Yeah_

_Anywhore, how do you sext?_

 

Mark stared at the the bubble signifying BamBam responding for a few tense seconds until the younger finally texted back.

 

_Mark, sweetie, I know you’re lonely_

_and I enjoyed the first time we smashed_

_but I have Yugyeom now ;P_

 

Mark rolled his eyes.

 

_I’m not saying we should sext_

_I’m asking how to do it_

_I wanna sext Jackson_

**Read 22:18 p.m.**

 

BamBam didn’t respond. Mark sighed and put his phone down, leaning back in his chair and staring at the books set out in front of him. He should really be studying. 

But he could also read the text BamBam just sent.

 

_Have you ever read smut?_

_….Maybe…._

_Write out what you would do_

_And have him answer with_

_what he would do_

 

Mark grunted, that seemed easy enough.

 

**Jackdick Wang**

Today 22:33 p.m.

 

_How do you think it feels?_

 

Jackson responded almost immediately.

 

_What?_

_Taking it up the ass?_

 

_Yeah_

 

_Hmm, I don’t know_

_Care to share?_

 

Mark had to think. It was hard to describe, honestly. Saying, ‘It feels like you’re being split in half but then exploding if the other person moves the right way,’ didn’t sound very appealing without first hand experience. 

He decided to call an expert in this field for advice. 

_“Hello?”_

Mark grinned, perfect.

“Hey, Jinyoung! I need your help,” Mark said a little too brightly.

Jinyoung groaned, _“What do you want?”_

“Oh come on, can’t you help a good hyung out?”

_“No, I cannot.”_

Mark chuckled despite Jinyoung’s tone. “Look, all I need you to do is describe to me what it feels like to take it up the ass.”

_“It feels like hell. Is that all?”_ Jinyoung growled out. Mark could hear Jaebum yell something about no more soju on the other end of the line.

“Almost. Can you describe that in a way that _won’t_ make Jackson think twice about bottoming for me?” Mark turned the page of his notebook just to feel productive.

Jinyoung was quiet for a few moments and Mark could still hear Jaebum crying about their lack of soju. _“Alright, fine. It feels like the other person….”_

Twenty minutes later, Mark had a page in his notebook, that was _supposed_ to be for math, filled with notes on what to tell Jackson.

 

Today 23:45 p.m.

_And that’s what it feels like_

_I see_

_Well then_

_It seems I will have to try it_

_for myself_

 

Mark grinned to himself triumphantly. Shout out to Park Jinyoung for being a world class bottom.

 

……………..

 

Step 4: Subtly ask for nudes 

 

The next day, Mark dragged himself out of bed with a heavy groan and a pounding head.

He was _really_ starting to regret staying in the library till the asscrack of dawn.

The door opened and Youngjae stepped in with a toothbrush in his mouth and a towel over his damp hair. His smile was way too bright for this early in the morning and Mark wanted to punch him.

“Morning sunshine! Glad you finally woke up,” he exclaimed. He walked over to his bed and put his shower supplies down.

Mark groaned again and grabbed his head. “Fucking hell, shhhhhh…”

Youngjae chuckled, “What’s wrong with you? Drink too much?” He crouched down in front of Mark on the floor.

“Ugh, I wish. What time is it even?” Mark whinned. He gave up trying to keep himself upright and flopped onto his side. He groaned again when his head hit the cold tile of the floor. “Why does the world hate me?”

“It’s eleven in the morning, sweetheart, and you have a class in an hour,” Youngjae said. He patted Mark’s shoulder before he stood up and started to get dressed.

Mark almost started crying. Fuck his major, he was just going to take the fucking test he spent all night studying for then drop out and become a garbage man. He heard they made a lot of money, so why the fuck not?

“Oh, by the way…” Youngjae murmured from next to the drawer. “You got a couple texts from Jackson earlier. It looks like you’re already on step four?”

Mark opened his eyes and sat up quickly. “Where the fuck is my phone?”

Youngjae handed it over timidly.

Mark snatched it from his hand and scrolled through the many texts from Jackson.  
  


Today 8:52 a.m.

 

_Hey there sexy ;)_

_I know you’re not awake yet_

_But i wanted to text you before I go_

_to class_

_Want to meet up soon? I’m feeling_

_lonely_

 

Today 10:13 a.m.

 

_Just to be clear, I want to have_

_sex with you again_

 

Mark giggled at the last one. No shit did he want to have sex again, that was the whole point for all of their conversations.

 

_We should def meet up again soon_

_But I kind of need something_

 

Jackson texted back almost immediately.

 

_What do you need?_

_I can only give so much ;)_

 

_I need to know you still have_

_something to offer_

 

Youngjae started singing to himself as he took his boxers off and walked around the dorm naked.

“Youngjae, please, I know you have a nice body and all but I’m trying to get a dick pic here,” Mark said, throwing a dirty shirt at Youngjae’s pale ass.

Youngjae laughed and wiggled his hips a little. “Sorry not sorry. You gotta go though, hyung.”

Mark looked at the time and his eyes widened. How the hell?

“Fuck me,” he whispered and quickly stood up to throw on the nearest pair of pants and a random shirt, which he was pretty sure was Youngjae’s.

He didn’t have time to read Jackson’s text, he had a full day of classes.

 

…………………

 

Step 5: Receive dick pic 

 

It wasn’t until Mark was sitting in a little corner at the back of the library late at night that he was able to Jackson’s text.

 

Yesterday 10:15 a.m.

 

_Oh, so you want nudes i see_

_Ask and you shall receive_

 

There wasn’t another text from Jackson the rest of the day, so Mark assumed he had to actually ask for one.

Well then. It couldn’t be that easy.

He decided to call a trusted advisor for help in this matter.

_“Make it quick, I’m busy,”_ Youngjae’s voice sounded gruff and huffy. Mark grinned at the thought of what was happening on the other end of the line.

“If you could stop the blowjob you’re getting for a second, I’ll tell you,” Mark said, so what if he wanted to be a bit of an asshole? It was two in the fucking morning.

Youngjae groaned lightly on the other end but complied anyway, _“Alright fine, there is nothing on my dick now. Go ahead.”_

“Cool beans. Jackson said if I ask, he’ll send me a dick pic, do I just ask now?” Mark frowned when Youngjae groaned. “Hey! I don’t want to talk to you while you’re getting your dick sucked!”

Someone nearby shushed him.

“ _Sorry sorry! Jus- just say yes, you’ll get what you want.”_

“Yeah, but that seems too easy, is it really just that?”

_“Yes!”_

“Hmmmmm….”

_“Look, hyung, I am getting a serious case of blue balls right now and I was kinda in the middle of something so could you please hang up?”_

Mark chuckled then sighed, his sweet Youngjae was all grown up now, “Okay okay, bye. Love you and don’t get any STD’s.”

Youngjae hung up on him before he could say anything else.

Welp, looked like it was now or never.

 

Today 2:33 a.m.

 

_I would like a dick pic from_

_you please_

 

Mark put his phone down next to him and pushed himself further into the corner. The carpet beneath him was scratchy and he was pretty sure he’d get rug burn if he moved too much, but he tried to study whatever book he had open.

Half an hour later, Mark was finally make at least some sort of headway in his Econ homework when his phone buzzed.

Oh boy, it was a message from Jackson. With a picture attached.

Mark opened the message and looked at the image. He started to laugh. Then he started to cheer.

Someone nearby shushed at him, but he was laughing too hard, his fist pumping in the air.

He had finally gotten a dick pic from Jackson Motherfucking Wang.


End file.
